


Drunk Ignorance

by xHaruka17x



Series: SPN ABO Bingo 2018 [13]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Alpha Dean, Alpha superiority, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Ashamed Dean, Gangbang, Hurt Castiel, Injustice, Multi, Omega Castiel, Omega Discrimination, Physical/Sexual Abuse, Rape, Soft Ending, Sub Con Omegaverse, Subject of Abortion, Victim Castiel, Wolf Castiel, Wolf Dean, non con, not graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-07-07 03:00:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15899547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xHaruka17x/pseuds/xHaruka17x
Summary: New town, new university, new ‘friends’. Dean finds himself taking part in a horrific act while out drinking with his questionable new friends. He was extremely inebriated, and that night is a blur until a piece of that evening is staring him in the face, and Dean has to come to the realization that he is a monster...a monster wanting redemption.SPN ABO Bingo Challenge Entry.Square Filled: Free Space





	Drunk Ignorance

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s notes: WARNING!! trigger fic, read tags, read at your own discretion. 
> 
>  
> 
> A very huge thank you to Diminuel for the amazing NSFW art work!!!!  
> Check out her page! http://diminuel.tumblr.com/

  
  
A night on the town was exactly what twenty-four year old Alpha Dean Winchester needed. He had just transferred to this university in order to be closer to his brother Sam and his parents, and to continue his Masters in engineering. The move, new class schedule, and the need to study for midterms had left him exhausted and stressed. He needed a pick-me-up, and luckily his new roommate, a large Alpha named Raphael who was on the varsity team, invited him to join him and his buddies to bar hop.  
  
Dean had only been at the university a month when they set out. There were four of them. Raphael’s two friends, Gordon, an Alpha who was also on the varsity team, and Asa, an Alpha, who was on the baseball team with Dean, were also in the group.  
  
They were rowdy and quite opinionated. They catcalled any Omega they saw, like typical college Alpha knot heads. Dean simply smirked at their antics and drank his beer. He was on his fifth, and a seventh shot of something he had never heard of that Asa kept getting them, when Raphael announced he had gotten a phone call from a friend, and they were invited to a house party. Dean followed, feeling nice and drunk with no worries of having to drive. Everything was within walking distance. He followed his friends numbly, giggling with them during silly jokes, yet not truly understanding nor hearing what the others were going on about. He was just feeling good and relaxed.  
  
They reached the house, and rock music could be heard from the front porch. They walked in, and Dean was immediately hit with the scent of Omegas...aroused Omegas. The house was packed, and it confused Dean since all he could see in his blurry state were Alphas. Yet the Omega scents were strong. He was pretty sure he could smell two of them… and they were in heat.  
  
Raphael brought him further into the house, where the main party goers seemed to be congregating, and Dean stood shocked at what he saw. In the middle of the room, two nude Omegas were being gang-banged, while they were surrounded by onlookers cheering the events on.  
  
Dean couldn’t really make out the Omega on the other side of the room, but the one closest to him was gorgeous. Flushed cheeks, dark hair and eyes glazed over by his heat. He was being spit roasted, and seemed to be completely into what was going on. Dean couldn’t stop staring as his cock twitched in interest. He snorted to himself, a bit giddy that even so drunk his cock was awake. He was sure it had something to do with the amazing scent the Omega was giving off.  
  
“Hey Winchester, like what you see?” Raphael and Gordon teased. Both had obviously caught on to Dean’s goofy grin as he watched the Omega getting ejaculated onto his face and back.  
  
Dean nodded, too out of it to speak.  
  
“Omega! Come here and let my buddy fuck you,” Raphael barked out towards the dark hair Omega, who was getting his face cleaned and back wiped by some sober looking Beta that glared at Raphael. The Alpha snarled. “Now, Omega,” he added with an Alpha tone, making the Omega visibly tremble. He was unable to physically go against the command.  
  
“Wait-” Dean said, trying to fully grasp what was happening as Asa and Gordon started to ‘help’ him strip while the Omega lay down before him, legs open and waiting. Dean could barely make out the details of him besides the stunning blue eyes that seemed to scream at the Alpha, but his brain was too fuzzy to understand. He dropped to his knees, free of his clothes and fuck….the smell this Omega gave off was doing nothing but stirring his Alpha right up for action. Sunflowers flooded Dean’s nose, and as he took hold of the Omega’s thighs, the ever so sweet tint of pure honey hit him. The Omega’s heat was at its peak, and it made Dean growl in want.  
  
He ran his hands over the feverish pale skin beneath him, savoring the soft whimpering sounds the Omega made, and damn, Dean’s hunger grew with every sound that left those pink lips. The Alpha pulled the Omega towards him and rubbed his cock against the plentiful amount of slick that covered and leaked from his hole. Dean didn’t have the presence of mind to even remember they were in a room full of other Alphas. The music and ruckus was loud around them, but Dean forgot them completely and drowned into the devilish heat of the Omega’s hole in one smooth thrust. He was lost to his wolf after that.  
  
  


 

Dean roared obsessively as he pounded into the Omega’s open and willing body, feeling high and powerful as the Omega moaned and cried out beneath him. He couldn’t figure out how long he had gone, only that he had felt the Omega climax under him as his walls had clasped down on Dean’s forming knot. He could vaguely make out his ‘friends’ cheering him on as his hips thrust in abandon as he chased his release. He came in a rushed growl as he bared his teeth and buried his face in the Omega’s neck.

Dean flinched as his nose made out the faint scent of copper on the Omega. It smelled wrong, and as he managed to tilt his head in his increasingly dizzying state, he watched as a tear slid down the side of the Omega’s closed eye before darkness took Dean’s consciousness.

  
  


**###### Two Months Later ######**

The last few weeks had been ones of reflection and decisions for Dean. He had rather quickly realized that Raphael, Gordon and Asa were complete assholes. After their drunken outing (which Dean couldn’t remember much of besides bits and pieces that he couldn't understand) he tried asking the Alphas, but he couldn’t get any straight answers from them beside ‘oh, you had a great time’ and laughs. It only added to Dean distancing himself from them. They weren’t well liked by anyone on campus, and Dean decided to focus on his studies instead of their social cues. After two weeks of them trying to get Dean to join their clique, they finally gave up after Dean made it clear that he wanted to keep his grades up and graduate with his Masters.

Dean was presently heading over to the coffee shop that was off campus. It had much better and cheaper dark roast then the one the university featured, and he made it a point to avoid where Raphael and the others frequented. He crossed over towards ‘Med Street’. Its nickname came from the fact that particular strip of road hosted multiple medical centers for pups, as well as specializing in different subgenders. Dean looked up at the massive blue sign that read ‘Omega Hospital’ and smirked, liking the fact that it was the closest to the university. Next to it was the Beta Center, and further down was the Alpha Clinic. No fancy names, only simplicity in where one needed to go for help. Sam had sold Dean on this when they had looked at the university together for Dean to attend.

The Alpha could see the coffee shop just ahead when the sudden scent of sunflowers hit his nose. The smell triggered a flash of a memory from that drunken night. A glimpse of blue eyes and the scent of honey hit him, making him stop in his tracks. He didn't remember much about that night, but he had woken up the next morning in his own bed at the dorm with a sense of unease.

Movement across the street by the Omega Hospital caught his eye. The Alpha turned, nose scenting the air, and the distinctive scent of sunflowers was coming from an Omega just leaving the facility. Dean watched him for a moment, just observing. The Omega was male, and had dark hair that swayed in the soft breeze. He was wearing a long sleeved hoodie, with the hood bunched up around his neck as if he was trying to hide, and baggy sweatpants and sneakers. He looked swallowed up in his clothes as he held what appeared to be some kind of bag tightly against his chest.

Before he knew what he was doing, Dean’s feet brought him towards the Omega. “Hi! I think I know you,” he voiced brightly, smiling at the Omega as he reached him.

The Omega stopped stiffly, clutching the bag against him in a white knuckle grip, and his bright blue eyes looked up at Dean.

“Um, sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. I caught your scent, and it’s such an amazing smell.” Dean was babbling; he knew it, but he couldn’t help himself. Now that he could see the Omega clearly, he was gorgeous. The Alpha rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly as his mouth ran away from him. “I’m sorry if I was rough or got carried away that night…it was you, right?” Dean felt his wolf keen at the Omega’s scent. However, his smile dissipated when he let himself scent the Omega properly. It was sunflowers, yes, but he was giving off a distressed scent now. He was just about to say something when the Omega slapped him, clear across his face, stunning Dean in place.

The Omega gasped, as if shocked by his own actions. Fear scented the air, and then the Omega was running. Dean snapped out of it and started after the retreating Omega. “Hey! Wait!” he called out, as he watched the Omega struggling to run. What the hell was going on? Something was extremely wrong with the Omega.

The Omega crawled to a stop as he leaned against the cement wall by the rounding platform of the sidewalk. He was panting, and his hands were plastered over his stomach as if in dire pain. He reeked of fear and agony.

“Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. Are you ok? Do you need help?” Dean asked carefully. He kept his hands visible for the Omega, who was watching with panicked wide eyes. “I’m Dean. I swear I won’t hurt you, I just wanna make sure you’re ok. Is there someone I can call for you?” Dean’s heart was pounding. Something was vastly wrong here, and the stone at the pit of Dean’s stomach only grew colder. This was most definitely the same Omega from that night, yet this was not what Dean had expected or hoped for if he had ever seen him again. This was a very visibly frightened Omega who was in some kind of physical pain.

The Omega shook his head ‘no’ and released a sigh as he closed his eyes tightly, biting his lip as he caressed his lower stomach. Dean stared wide eyed at him, and then turned back to look at the Omega Hospital. He had come from there. The Omega was slightly trembling and seemed feverish.

“Look, how about I just help you get home? You really don’t look well,” Dean offered. He was genuinely worried for this Omega, and his mind flooded as to the reasons why. The Omega looked at him once more, seeming to assess him, watching to see if he truly meant to only help and not add to his predicament. Dean gave him his best gentle smirk, and made sure his scent gave off safety and soothing vibes in order to comfort the clearly troubled Omega.

“My name is Castiel,” the Omega managed in a small voice, looking completely disheveled and in desperate need of protection.

They started their walk slowly. Dean stayed near, yet not overwhelming or intimidating the Omega, simply being a solid presence in case the Omega needed him. It was several more moments before the Omega stopped again and panted in pain as he held his stomach. “I shouldn’t have run,” he murmured to himself, clearly chastising himself for adding to his pain.

Dean stood with his hands in his pockets. “Do you want me to call a cab? I have my car, but it’s parked at the dorms on campus.”

“No. It's just a little bit further,” Castiel grumbled, as he carefully pushed himself off of the railing he had been leaning against to start walking again. That's when Dean noticed the dark stain on the back of the Omega’s jeans. It looked like blood.

Dean swallowed the ball of anxiety that danced in his throat. The fear and distress laced in Castiel’s sunflower scent; the pain radiating off of him announcing wounded animal as he held on desperately to his stomach; and the place the Omega had just came from only left Dean to assume Castiel had sought medical attention in order to terminate something unwanted. Castiel’s first reaction to him only served to heighten the need to look at that night two months ago, and what had occurred to bring the Omega here to this point in time.

The Alpha followed numbly as the Omega turned into what looked to be an apartment complex. Castiel apparently lived on the second floor, and slowly took each step one at a time. Pain seemed to shoot through him with every careful movement. Dean stayed behind him, ready to catch him if need be, but he kept his hands to himself.

They reached Castiel’s door, and the Omega leaned against it. It was clear he wouldn’t let Dean in, and the Alpha had no inclination to even ask, but this was all wrong. He needed to understand, and be sure of what happened.

“Look, I barely remember anything from that night, just bits and pieces. I had thought something was off the next day, but I couldn’t remember much beside your scent,” Dean started quietly, as he tried to push down his own fear that had been building since Castiel had slapped him. Something had been very wrong that night, and Dean had been part of it.  
  
They were silent for a long time. Dean was sure the Omega was simply going to tell him to leave until Castiel turned to face him, leaning back against his front door for support and giving him a hardened stare. “Do you make a habit of going out to get blackout drunk?” the Omega demanded, his voice filled with hushed anger.

The Alpha had momentarily been stunned by the turnaround, and gaped at Castiel. “What-I-uh, no. I mean no, I don’t. I rarely drink more than a few beers to relax between school weeks. That was-” Dean suddenly shut his mouth. The Omega didn’t look impressed, and making long winded replies wasn’t something that was pleasing the dark haired man. “No, I don’t,”  
the Alpha stated clearly.

Castiel nodded as if accepting his answer, before he seemed to be contemplating what to say next. No matter what Dean had previously thought, what the Omega was about to tell him made him sick to his stomach.

“I was dating one of the Alphas at that house party. This was only our third date. When we got there, I knew something was off about it. There was only one other Omega there, who I didn’t know, and he looked just as put off as I was.” Castiel closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself. “It all happened so fast. I was talking to Alfie, the other Omega, for a few minutes. Both of us were thinking of leaving, feeling out of place with so many Alphas… neither of us were fast enough to realize why we had been brought there by our supposed dates. They grabbed us and injected us with this drug…”

Dean’s vision narrowed. He was gonna be ill. He sank down to his knees and slumped awkwardly against the metal railing behind his back.

“The drug sent us into this fake, yet extremely strong, version of our natural heats. It was excruciating. The fever; my body...I couldn’t control it, and I couldn’t form words because one of the Alphas had ordered me not to. My body obeyed on command without my consent. The need for a knot was desperate, while my mind was screaming ‘please, stop, I don’t want any of this’.” Castiel’s voice was harsh and angry as silent tears slid down his face.

Tears formed in Dean’s eyes, and he could no longer look at the Omega before him. He had ‘raped’ him. Everything twisted in his chest. He was a monster. The shame he felt settled like a cloud around him, and the nausea built in his stomach, threatening to spew out.

The Omega wrinkled his nose at the strong scent of shame and guilt that was radiating off the now devastated Alpha kneeling before him. He looked completely in shock, and Castiel was a bit astounded by the Alpha’s reaction. He clearly had no idea what had truly been going on in that house, and Castiel did remember how drunk ‘Dean’ had been. But it did not excuse him. Castiel clenched his teeth. “I pupped, but I couldn’t keep it,” he whispered, as his mixed emotions swirled inside of him at the trauma the whole ordeal had been. He caressed his now empty and aching abdomen.

Dean’s ears were ringing. The Omega had been raped by many and he was one of them… the Omega had pupped, and then Dean saw him leaving the Omega Hospital... it was all so obvious now that he had terminated that pregnancy. Dean turned away and emptied his stomach’s contents.

The Alpha took in a deep breath to calm his drumming heart. There was absolute shame and guilt wrecking his insides at his monstrous actions towards an innocent Omega that had never wanted any of it. Dean covered his mouth as he cried silently for Castiel’s pain. Being subjected to something so horrendously cruel was unfathomable to him.

Sam. His baby brother was an Omega, and the thought of anyone doing something like this to him would have Dean seeing red. He would rip out the throats of every Alpha that would have ever dared. And yet….he had done it to Castiel. Being as inebriated as he had been didn’t excuse any of it. Sam would never look at him the same after this. Dean didn’t deserve forgiveness.

“ ‘I’m sorry’ will never be enough, but I am. I’m so, so very sorry.” The Alpha choked on the words as he tried to voice his most sincere apology for the atrocious part he had played in the beautiful Omega’s pain.

Castiel only hummed in acknowledgement of the Alpha’s words. Dean reeked of desperation and guilt. The stench of it made the Omega wrinkle his nose. Part of him was elated to get any kind of apology for what had happened to him, while the other part of him growled out ‘too little, too late’.

“I’ll go to the police. I don’t know all that was there and who has…touched you. But I can own up to my part. This should have never happened to you, and I can’t tell you how much I wish none of it ever happened. I wish I hadn’t been so drunk. Maybe I would have been able to help you instead. I…” Dean buried his face into his hands. He was a monster.

“The police won’t do anything. We Omegas are second-class citizens. Alphas can do no wrong,” Castiel snarled in irritation. Authorities followed the laws, and the laws clearly started Omegas were basically nothing.

“I’m still going. What I did to you… wrong doesn’t even begin to cover it,” Dean voiced gently as he stood, gaining a wide-eyed, surprised look from the Omega’s blue eyes.

“You are going to turn yourself in?”

“Yes, right now. I hate myself for what I’ve done. My baby brother is an Omega and if anyone…” He couldn’t finish the sentence as he watched the now curious gaze, that still held a bit of anger, turn somber.

Dean selfishly took in the sight of the beautiful Omega before him, and wished with everything he had that they had met under different circumstances. One where Dean would have been able to show him he wasn’t this now-disgusting version of the Alpha he once tried to be proud of.

He walked away from the stunned Omega, carrying his sunflower scent in his nose as he started towards the police station.

 

**#####**

 

“I need to confess to a crime.” Dean squared his shoulders as he informed the desk deputy why he was standing before her in the police precinct. He would own up to his appalling misconduct, because there was no other way for him to move forward with this in his heart. Neither Castiel nor any Omega deserved to be treated so cruelly, abused, and disrespected in such filthy ways. Dean had always prided himself in not being one of those knot head Alphas that liked to live in the archaic past where Omegas were enslaved toys. Times had changed, and Omega’s rights had improved. Dean hoped that Castiel had been wrong when he said the police wouldn’t do anything. How could they not, especially since he was turning himself in. He would do this first, and then he would have to face Sam. Telling him was going to be difficult, and it set a primal fear in Dean’s heart that he would lose his baby brother's respect. He had always tried to be a good Alpha brother that Sam could count on… now the disappointment and anger that would follow made him wonder if he would ever been able to atone in any way for what he had done. He wanted to make it up to Castiel, and he was sure that turning himself in was the best way to show him he was truly and genuinely remorseful for his actions.

“What kind of crime? Petty thievery? Robbery? Narcotics? Assault? Or homicide?” the bored Beta before him asked nonchalantly, like she dealt with people walking in to confess to crimes on a daily basis and was clearly unimpressed.

“Assault,” the Alpha replied.

The dark haired Beta looked him up and down, sizing him up, before she snapped her gum at him and stepped out from behind the desk. “Follow me.”

She brought him through the bull pen and down the row of desks with multiple officers and detectives hard at work, and told him to sit at a chair by the desk of a middle aged Alpha with an early receding hairline. His name plate on his desk read ‘Detective A. Ross’.

“Alright son, what brings you here?” Alpha Ross asked, as he sat ready with a pen and legal pad to write down whatever Dean was about to say.

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This was what was right. What happened to him from here didn’t compare to the horrible nightmare Castiel and the other Omega had gone through. He would own his fuck up, and openly accept whatever was to happen next like a grown man.

“Two months ago, I was at a house party. They had two Omegas drugged up and passed around to be...to be raped.” He whispered the last word. “I was one of the Alphas that abused one of them.” The admission felt like acid in his mouth, and he did his best to keep his tears at bay.

The older cop looked at him grimly and sighed, suddenly looking utterly exhausted. “Was the Omega in heat?”

Dean frowned. He had just confessed to a horrible crime, and the first thing the cop asked him was if the Omega was in heat? “Yes, but-”

The police officer cut him off. “Then there's nothing I can do.”

“What? But he was drugged to induce his heat!” Dean barked. “What the hell do you mean, there’s nothing you can do?” The Alpha was completely agitated.

“Even if you could prove that, the law says that under any circumstances, an Alpha affected by an Omega’s heat is not held accountable for anything he/she does. The only time this law is overruled is if it results in the Omega’s death. Only then will the DA charge the Alpha with a crime,” the Cop informed him, as he gritted his teeth in irritation.

Dean was shocked and disgusted all at once. “He had to get an abortion… couldn’t he get some kind of justice for what he went through?”

“You said there were multiple Alphas. Would he be able to tell who the father was?”

“I don't think so...”

“Well, then, honestly it’s best.” The older Alpha met Dean’s disbelieving and angry gaze. “Son, if he did, and tried to press charges, which, again, wouldn't even get an eyeball roll from the DA, the presumed father of that pup could evoke his or her sire rights-meaning they could force the Omega to bear that pup to delivery, or, if the Omega went ahead with the abortion without the known Alpha sire’s consent, guess who would face jail time if the Alpha wanted to punish the Omega.”

“That’s completely crazy! Doesn't this affect you with how wrong all this is?” Dean demanded as his mind reeled from the state ‘laws’ in place. He knew Omegas weren’t as highly regarded, yet there had been many improvements for their ways of life, such as being able to go to school, live on their own, have good jobs and yet…they were still treated as property. Like worthless beings that were only given a teasing amount of ‘rights’ to hide the truth that no matter what, Alphas were always superior and Omegas would always be their slave in some form.

“More than you know. I have two pups, both Omegas. I pray for their safety and for them to never have to go through the cruelty of our broken and archaic society…but I’m just one Alpha cop. I have no power.”

Dean was crushed by this. “How do I fix this?” he whispered, more to himself then the cop.

“My only suggestion is if you know this Omega, try to atone for what you've done to him. He's the only one that can release you of your guilt once have done it for yourself,” the older Alpha told him gently. “If anything, you being here and turning yourself in for this horrible mistake says a lot about you.”

Dean swallowed and nodded his understanding.

 

**#####**

 

He hadn’t slept last night after what he had learned at the police station. He felt angry with himself for not having known how the authorities still followed the barbaric laws of ‘Alphas can do no wrong’. He had been ignorant at best, and it only fueled his need to change things, to do something; anything. At three in the morning, after tossing and turning about what ifs and wishful hopes, he broke down and called Sam.

It had been the hardest moment in Dean’s life to admit to his little brother that he had done something so horrific. Losing Sam’s respect, and perhaps completely shattering their tight relationship, was terrifying to the Alpha. He had always prided himself on protecting those that couldn’t fight for themselves, and in one night, he had turned into the very thing he had sworn to never be. He had not helped others from ever being prey.

Sam had answered, half asleep yet clearly happy-and worried-to hear from him at such an hour. The ball of emotions that had lodged itself in Dean’s throat had made it obvious to the young Omega that something was extremely wrong with his older brother. Sam had waited patiently as Dean had struggled to find the right words.

“I raped someone,” Dean had blurted out, as tears fell down his face while he sat on the edge of his bed. He had repeatedly mumbled the words until he had heard Sam’s sigh at the other end.

"Dean, start at the beginning. What happened?" His younger brother had asked carefully. Dean had unloaded then; had told his Omega brother how he’d gone out with the other Alphas and how wasted he had been when they had gone to the house party, and the monstrous event that had followed. The Alpha was certain Sam could feel his shame across the line, choking on his emotions as he awaited his brother’s wrath. They had sat in painful silence as Dean swallowed down his guilt in gulps.

"Sammy?"

"Yeah. I’m still here, Dean."

"You hate me, don't you?"

"No, Dean, I don’t hate you. What I hear are facts, things you did that you had no control over, and neither did Castiel. The only part of this you can feel responsible for is your guilt, and all you can do now is be there for him IF he will let you. Show him not all Alphas are the same, and be someone he can count on when the world can't do the same."

“I’m sorry, Sammy, I’m so sorry…”

"It’s okay Dean. I love you. I forgive you, but the one you need to hear that from is Castiel, not me."

“I know, but how can I show him besides repeating a pathetic ‘I’m sorry’?”

“He goes to your university, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok, well, I have a few suggestions...”

 

**#####**

 

The following day, Dean returned to Castiel’s apartment building. He knocked on the Omega’s door and heard someone shuffling inside. “Who is it?” Castiel asked, with heavy suspicion in his voice.

“Hi Castiel, it's me, Dean-”

“I’m not opening the door,” Castiel growled out.

“I don’t want you to. I just came to talk to you through the door, if you have a few minutes,” Dean stated. After a few long moments, he decided the Omega was most likely simply waiting for him to say what he needed and to leave. So the Alpha sat down on the welcome mat and leaned back against the door. “I went to the police like I promised…”

He felt the pressure against the door, letting him know that Castiel had apparently decided to do as he had: sit on the floor with his back against the door, ready to hear whatever Dean had come to tell him.

“You were right, they wouldn’t do anything.” Dean told him about his conversation with Detective Ross-every single word that had been exchanged; even about the Detective's own Omega pups, and how he had simply stated he was only one Alpha. Dean had heard Castiel snort at that.

Dean went on to tell Castiel about how he had called his brother and had told him what he had done to him; how he had been so sure his baby brother would hate him, resent him and rage at him. He told Castiel about how grateful he was when Sam told him he didn’t hate him. He had stayed quiet for a bit afterward, listening for any sounds or movements from the other side of the door.

“If you’ll let me, Cas, I’d like to try my best to show you we’re not all like that. That I’m not this kind of Alpha.” They had stayed seated, the door in between them, both silent and contemplative after all that Dean had aired, both lost in thought as they could scent each other’s aromas, ever so slightly, from under the door.

 

**#####**

 

Over the next month, Dean had started a routine with Castiel’s door. Since the Omega went to the same university, but wasn’t yet comfortable leaving his apartment, the Alpha had taken it upon himself to bring him his class work as well as bring them back to the school. Dean had also taken to bringing the Omega groceries in the same manner, knowing Castiel would only open the door once he was gone, and Dean was good with that. It helped Castiel, and it made Dean feel as if he was doing something decent for the Omega.

On some days, Dean would stay there, seated against the door to do his own homework while casually speaking about his day, his frustrations and whatever else that crossed his mind, and sometimes, when the Omega felt comfortable enough, he would participate in light conversation. It pleased Dean to no end, making his heart swell whenever he could hear some form of delight in Cas’s voice, or whenever he could get slight whiffs of that sunflower scent laced with joy.

These almost daily events between them had started to truly mean something to the Alpha. Any time he thought of Castiel whenever he was away from the door, or whenever he would see something that would remind him of the Omega, such as the color blue, anything remotely mathematical, or history based, it would remind him that Castiel was a Calculus major and wanted to travel to visit historical sites all over the world. It would make him grin.

Sam would call him often, checking in on him and how his relationship with Castiel was progressing.

“You really like him, don’t you?” Sam had quietly asked, after one of their conversations where Dean had once again gone on and on about the dark haired Omega.

Dean had stopped short mid sentence at his brother’s question. He had closed his eyes and took in a deep breath as he sighed. “Yeah…I do.”

Sam had then offered for Dean to give Castiel his number, so he would have an Omega to talk to if Dean became too annoying. Dean had snorted at the jab, yet had agreed. Castiel deserved friends. Dean had noticed rather quickly, since he was pretty much camped out on the Omega’s front door, that no one ever seemed to come and visit him. The Alpha had slipped the note with his brother’s number into the next mountain of homework he had brought to Castiel.

It was almost thirteen weeks to the day since that horrible night. The police had refused to do anything based off archaic laws that disregarded basic human rights for Omegas. Dean hadn’t exactly been able to prove anything about the drug. It was illegal, obviously, but it was almost as if because Alphas were using it, the police looked the other way. That had left Dean with only one solution for him to bring the subject forward.

With Sam’s suggestion, Dean had spent a great deal of time in the university’s newspaper department. He had convinced the head editor to let him submit a crucial article about that night. Of course, he had changed names, mainly to protect Castiel’s identity, and the editor had refused to let him sign the piece, stating that it would only be submitted as An Anonymous Alpha, since the article could very well put him at risk of serious backlash of the physical kind. Sam had agreed with the editor, much to Dean’s frustration. Getting jumped or attacked wouldn’t help anyone, nor would it prove anything, other than what he was doing, that he was remorseful in his part in the act.

When the article came out, it was as if a tidal wave had crashed through the university. The students, as well as staff members, had taken its events to heart, and Dean had been awed as well as crushed when multiple groups of Omegas had come forward, claiming what had happened to ‘Jimmy’ in the article had also happened to them. Dean had been shocked that even Omega teachers and professors had stepped forward with similar stories.

The fact that it had taken an Alpha, crushed under the weight of his own guilt for what he had done, to go public and bring the issue of the drug and the fact that Omegas were subjected to such horrific ordeals, sent a demand across the campus as well as the town and the state to do something about its archaic laws.

Dean’s article had suggested the buddy system: Omegas should learn to trust themselves and their gut instincts, and leave when a situation made them feel uneasy. With the laws still seeing Omegas as second class, if not lower, forms of citizens, it was up to them, the new generation, to force change to help and protect Omegas. They mattered. They were the ones that should be at the top, and not the Alphas. As powerful beings that brought forth lives, they should be cherished and respected to the utmost. Alphas were and meant absolutely nothing without Omegas, and everyone knew it.

The Alpha had been in awe at how quickly the ripple effects of his article-which he had titled ‘My Guilt is Nothing Compared to Jimmy’s Pain’-had taken on a life of its own. He had changed Castiel’s name to Jimmy when the Omega had told him during their through the door conversation that he loved Jimi Hendrix’s music. Dean had snuck the article into Castiel’s homework the week it came out. Yet the Omega hadn’t mentioned it, and it gave the Alpha mixed feelings. On one hand, he understood that Castiel might not want to revisit the events of that night, yet a part of him wanted to know that Castiel saw that he was truly trying to show him he wasn’t that mindless knot head that hurt him. Dean had even stopped drinking since that night. It terrified him to think he had been that out of control; that his wolf had taken over as biology had raised its head with the scent of Omegas in heat. It hadn’t exactly been the first time Dean had been around Omegas in heat, but it had been the first time where he had been inebriated, and it would never happen again.

He had been standing in front of Castiel’s front door for the last ten minutes with his mind and heart racing. He wanted so desperately to have a chance to show the Omega he could be a good Alpha. He held the small and simple red chrysanthemum and iris bouquet in his hands, making himself take a deep breath as he felt the winds pick up around him. There had been storm clouds all throughout the day, and as the late afternoon started to disappear behind the dark clouds, Dean finally knocked on the door.

“Dean?” He heard Castiel’s gentle hum of his name, which did nothing but fuel the hope and fear that swirled inside of him as he bit his lower lip. Sam had been encouraging him to do this. Dean wasn’t so sure, but he wouldn’t know unless he tried. He had no idea if Sam and Castiel ever spoke; neither would ever tell him, and he would never ask.

“Yeah, hey, Cas, um… these past few weeks have been really important to me,” Dean started as he looked down at the bright red and blue flowers he held. “Really special to me. I know I’ve repeatedly apologized for what happened. I’d like to think we’ve sort of become friends since, even though I know I still owe you so much.” The Alpha took a deep breath. The Omega hadn’t outright said he forgave him, and that incredibly important detail terrified him the most as he stood there.

Rain drops started to fall as the wind blew westward, hitting Dean with a light shower. This was fitting. He would bare his heart, and all he could do was hope. If Castiel rejected him, it was nothing whatsoever compared to what Castiel had gone through. Dean would take his broken heart, and continue to hope for happiness and safety for the Omega.

“I’ve wished a million times we had met differently. I’m not like those other Alphas. I know I have no real right, but I’m going to ask anyway. Castiel, would you consider giving me a chance to show you how much you’ve come to mean to me? Give me a chance to atone for my darkest moment in which I hurt you? I care for you so much.” Dean swallowed around the lump in his throat. He was soaked now with the storm fully descending upon him, and he smirked bitterly. His voice wouldn’t work, as it suddenly felt the full weight of what he had just admitted to the Omega. Long moments stretched on, and he supposed this was his answer. He knew he had never been deserving of a chance, but he had been hopeful enough to ask for one. Dean wondered, had he been in Castiel’s shoes, if he would have even bothered to have the friendship they had developed. He was truly thankful for it, and he only hoped, despite making his feelings known, that Castiel would continue to have their through-the-door afternoons.

Dean moved to leave the now wet flowers on the welcoming mat when the sound of the door’s multiple locks loosening was heard. He stayed completely still and wide-eyed as Castiel opened the door. The Omega was dressed in warm blue heart pajama pants, and an over-sized and well loved grey Hendrix hoodie, looking up at Dean with wide, solemn cerulean eyes that reflected so many emotions, the Alpha couldn’t sort through them all. His dark hair was all over the place, as if he had just rolled out of bed, and his plush pink lips were slightly parted, as though he were surprised. The gentle scent of sunflowers, and happy yet cautious Omega, hit the Alpha’s nose, and all Dean wanted to do was hug him tightly and beg for forgiveness.

“Are those for me?” Castiel asked, his voice soft in the rush of the now harsh rainfall behind Dean.

“Yeah...sorry, they are a bit wet,” Dean admitted sheepishly, as he slowly handed over the modest bouquet.

Castiel took the flowers and graced Dean with a gentle smile.

Dean returned the smile.

 

**End**


End file.
